Nanda: The first time that I saw Srila Prabhupada was in Mexico. I was immediately struck with how short he was because every time we saw pictures of Srila Prabhupada, he was always grandly sitting on his asana and he was such a huge person in our lives. I was amazed that he was not as tall as I had imagined. While he sat on the vyasasana before giving class, I had my first eye contact with him that I could physically feel. Just like when the sun comes out from behind a dark cloud, you can physically feel the rays of the sun. Similarly, I could feel Srila Prabhupada’s glance. It was as if time had stopped and I felt a connection from back in eternal time so much so that tears gushed from my eyes. I was ecstatic, sad, surprised, ashamed, unashamed, everything all at once when that connection was made. Just before he began class, the cook came bursting out declaring that she wanted to hear Prabhupada’s class and would therefore not cook the offering because in those days there were no speakers in the kitchen. I surrendered to the moment and gave up my seat in the temple room and cooked the breakfast offering myself with much chagrin. After the class, Prabhupada went up to his room and straight away asked to taste the offering. The next day Srutakirti said, “Prabhupada liked the offering. He thought it was very nice.” So what I first thought was bad luck that I couldn’t hear Prabhupada’s class, became a blessing that I could cook for Krishna and Prabhupada directly and get satisfaction that he was satisfied. I’ve realized from that that you can’t always understand why certain things happen to you in the moment.
Another time in Mexico someone made an announcement, “Srila Prabhupada’s going to do a tour of the temple! Clean up all your areas! He’s coming down in five minutes!” At that moment I saw there were several buckets filled with old flowers and stems in the pantry area just before entering the kitchen. I then squished all the buckets behind two doors making the visual, at least straight ahead, a somewhat organized kitchen. Of course when Prabhupada he came in, he opened the doors and immediately turned to the right and saw the buckets of half picked over flowers and said, “Who has done this?” With great delight, all the devotees said, “The pujaris have done this, Srila Prabhupada.” Prabhupada said, “These pujaris should be replaced.” [laughs] It was a crushing blow, but amazingly I didn’t feel crushed at all by it. It was rather an ecstatic happening as it was a relationship with Srila Prabhupada. I’ll also admit that I knew they weren’t going to just replace me because they didn’t have anybody to replace me with. Then he continued further into the kitchen. He looked into the pot that was on the stove and asked, “What is this?” The devotees said, “It’s lentils, Srila Prabhupada. They’re the lentils for the breakfast.” Prabhupada said, “Lentils are for horses.” [laughs] There were always these little tidbits of nectar when Prabhupada walked around.
The one darshan with Srila Prabhupada that had the most impact on me was when he met with two representatives of the Cardinal of Mexico. Prabhupada gave a very brief description of Krishna consciousness, only covering the four regulative principles. But when he got to “no meat eating” he made the comment, “And this bullfighting must be stopped.” He said, “This bull-fighting is very sinful and you must stop it.” He also mentioned how Jesus Christ was our guru. He said, “You can give us your churches. We can preach from the Bible about Krishna consciousness because we accept Christ as our guru.” Then the men got a little fidgety. They asked, “Are there any young people in your movement?” Prabhupada swept his hands across the room and said, “Look. Look in front of you. They’re all young people.” Then they looked at their watches and said, “Oh, thank you sir, thank you, but we have to go now. We have another engagement. Thank you for your time. If we have any questions, can we come and ask you?” Prabhupada again gestured to all of the devotees and said, “If you are very sincere, you can talk with me. But you can speak with them if you have any questions.” Then they said, “Thank you”, got up and left the room. Prabhupada broke into a big smile and with a chuckle said, “These are not true Christians. Did you notice? As soon as I said they should stop their bull-fighting, they left.” Also at that darshan, was Hanuman, who was preaching in Argentina and was the first sannyasi that I know of who left that order and got married. Because my friends, Sita and Jagajivan, were having issues with him, I felt I also could not be his friend. Therefore, I had an attitude towards Hanuman. I admit it. So after the two Cardinal representatives left the room, Hanuman said, “Prabhupada, should we put a picture of Jesus Christ on the altar? You said he was our guru. Should we put a picture of Jesus Christ on our altar and worship him?” Prabhupada said, “I have not said that.” Then he asked, “Prabhupada, I want to know if you’ve rejected me just like Lord Chaitanya had rejected Chota Haridas?” I was in the back of the room thinking, “Now Prabhupada’s really going to give it to him. He’s going to get the sauce for all the trouble and anxiety he’s caused my friends. I’m really glad he asked that question because no one could give it to him like Prabhupada.” But Prabhupada said, “No, I have not rejected you.” He said, “Lord Chaitanya is God and He can spread this movement all around the world all by Himself. But I am not God. I am totally dependent on you for the help you have given me.” I was floored just to see how compassionate and how much love Prabhupada had for all of us. The next thing that happened was a little embarrassing for me. Some devotees had left the room that created some space in front of Srila Prabhupada. Sita and I grabbed the opportunity and came forward and sat right at the corner of Prabhupada’s desk as he continued to talk about Jesus Christ and Christianity. Sita asked, “Srila Prabhupada, why couldn’t Jesus Christ save his followers?” Prabhupada said, “Because they were so degraded. They were tenth class people.” I still didn’t get it. I was thinking that Prabhupada and Christ as pure devotees were the same and thinking we were more degraded and Prabhupada is saving us why couldn’t Jesus save his followers? So I asked another question, but it just happened to be exactly the same words. “But Srila Prabhupada, how come Jesus Christ couldn’t save his followers?” Prabhupada looked over at me and gave me a look like you want to teach a two year old how to add, but you know it’s way above their head. That’s the look I got from Srila Prabhupada. He said, “If somebody’s a murderer, he’s not a very good person, is he?” I said, “No, Srila Prabhupada.” “They were murderers. They were tenth class.” Rohini Kumar said, “Jai. All glories to you, Srila Prabhupada. You are so great, that even though we were so fallen, you saved us. You are great Srila Prabhupada because you saved us!” Everyone went “Jai, Srila Prabhupada!” Prabhupada said, “No. I am not so great. It is this Hare Krishna mantra that is great.” Then Srutakirti said, “Jai, Srila Prabhupada, you’re so great because you have brought us this Hare Krishna mantra. And this Hare Krishna mantra has saved us and you are so great because you brought us that!” I saw Srila Prabhupada’s cheeks turn red. I saw them. They got red. He blushed. He looked down and said, “Oh, that may be so.” His humility and expression were so beautiful. I never would have caught that from the back of the room. Then a kirtan had started in the back and Srutakirti said, “Oh, Srila Prabhupada, arotik has started and it’s time for you to get ready for your class.” Prabhupada said, “Just a moment, a little Bhagavatam.” He reached over without looking and what appeared to be at random, picked out a book and what appeared to be more random, opened the book and said, “You see? It says right here…,” and it was Kapiladev instructing Devahuti, third canto part four, about even someone of a low birth who chants Hare Krishna becomes eligible to perform sacrifices.
The qualities that strike me the most about Srila Prabhupada are his purity, his strength of character and his determination. It is not just the determination to spread the Krishna conscious movement all around the world but his determination to save us. He never gave up on us. We were incompetent in so many ways. We demonstrated that frailty innumerable times in front of him and rarely was he discouraged. Even if he had to give his chastisement, still that’s not where he left you. He never left you hopeless. He actually inspired hope in you. Prabhupada never left you alone and never, to this day, do you feel left alone. You feel you have the highest guidance, you have the most qualified person, the dearest friend, and the one who’s encouraging you the most to come to the highest platform. Prabhupada had that determination to spread Krishna consciousness all around the world but not without a personal relationship with every single disciple and every single person he came in contact with. You actually feel and experience that even today when we read his books. There might be a question that comes up in a group or in the audience, and then you just read a little bit more and “Oh, there’s the answer.” Because he’s always present, hearing and reciprocating with us. I find that most encouraging about Srila Prabhupada.
