Yadubara: During the two-month period when I lived with the devotees in India, in different ways Prabhupada encouraged me to become more of a devotee. Once I was a bit reluctant to bow down. I was taking pictures all the time and used that as an excuse. He sent one of his disciples to ask me to pay my obeisances when he came in. I didn’t have any hesitation doing that, as I had great respect and love for Prabhupada. Another time I shaved off my mustache. When I came in front of him, he said, “Oh that is very nice. You look very good.” In this way, with small exchanges, he encouraged me.
In 1973 in New York City, we started making the Hare Krishna People film, and at the Mayapur Festival in 1974, we premiered it. We showed it in Prabhupada’s room to Prabhupada and all the GBC members. He very much appreciated it. In fact, due to the Indian voltage, it was playing very slowly and all the voices were slow. That was traumatic for me, but Prabhupada and the devotees loved it.
Every time I filmed Prabhupada, he was totally himself. He wasn’t like a person who is usually in front of a camera, but he was completely natural. He never made any errors, and I never had to do a retake. In other words, I never had to stop Prabhupada and tell him to do this or that. Of course, that would have been the wrong thing to do anyway. Once we were filming in Bhaktivedanta Manor in England, and the tape recorder wasn’t working properly. We had to ask Prabhupada to stop speaking, and he didn’t like that at all. Finally we explained to him what the problem was, and he turned to Bhargava, who was operating the tape recorder, and said, “The tape recorder is useless, and you are useless.”
In Los Angeles I filmed Prabhupada’s daily activities for about a month, and then he traveled to Denver. I didn’t tell him that I was coming, but I also flew there to continue filming. I wanted to film Srila Prabhupada as much as I could. I set up lights in front of the vyasasana, and when he saw the lights he was disturbed. They were too bright. Brahmananda, his secretary, was asking, “Why did he come?” Prabhupada called me and said, “Whether I am sitting here or in Los Angeles, what is the difference? What is the need for more filming?” He cut me off at that point, but he was very concerned about what service I would have if I went back to Los Angeles. We did have another project, a film on New Vrindavan later called “The Spiritual Frontier”. But I was impressed that Prabhupada was concerned about what I would do next. He was always concerned in that way for his devotees.
I had gotten quite sick in India and, after returning to America, had gone on a special diet to try to regain my health. But the diet hadn’t worked. I had lost a lot of weight and was still sick. On a morning walk in Denver, Tamal Krishna Goswami began telling Prabhupada that, “Some devotees are involved in special diets. Yadubara has just tried one.” There was a discussion about such diets for a little while, and at one point I said, “Yes, Prabhupada these diets are useless.” All of a sudden Prabhupada stopped walking. Everybody else also stopped and got close to him to listen. Prabhupada looked at me and said, “The diet is useless or you are useless?” We create the diet and we embrace it. So we are the useless persons. We cannot blame the diet.
One time I was with Prabhupada when he arrived in Pittsburgh. I was walking backwards filming him as he came down the aisle. A devotee had paid his obeisances right behind me and I tripped and fell. The film shows what my camera did. Prabhupada walked by while I was on the ground, and he looked at me, unfazed. I was very fazed.
I was with Prabhupada in 1973 when George Harrison visited him in his room at Bhaktivedanta Manor. George had recorded a song called “Krishna, Where Are You?” that he played for Prabhupada. It had a very nice melody and words. Prabhupada appreciated it. He said, “Yes. Searching for Krishna is the proper mood.” As he heard the song he sat back and tapped his leg in time. He and George had a very nice relationship. They often would tell stories and laugh together in Prabhupada’s room.
I had a number of memorable incidents when I filmed Srila Prabhupada. One was on the roof of the apartments on our land in Juhu before the temple was built. Prabhupada would speak there in the twilight hours. One time the local eight, nine, and ten-year-old girls got dressed up and went to the roof to garland Prabhupada and do a dance for him. I filmed both the garlanding and the dancing. Later, when I was editing that film, I noticed that Prabhupada didn’t look at the girls. He had his hand in his bead bag, and he would look down and over and up but never at the girls. In this way he showed the example of an ideal sannyasi.
In Mayapur in 1974 or ’75, Prabhupada’s God-brother Sridhar Maharaj came to visit Prabhupada at the ISKCON Chandrodaya Mandir. When Prabhupada heard that Sridhar Maharaj had arrived, he immediately left his room and went down three flights of stairs to greet him. Sridhar Maharaj was old and weak and had to be carried upstairs. In Prabhupada’s room, the two of them had an affectionate, close, intimate discussion. Then out of ecstasy, Sridhar Swami started leading a kirtan, singing, “Haribol,” wonderfully. He jumped out of his chair, and as he got up, everybody got up and started dancing. In an old Vyasa-puja book there is a black-and-white picture from that time, showing Srila Prabhupada and the devotees dancing in Prabhupada’s room. Their meeting was very wonderful.
Once, during Srila Prabhupada’s last days in Vrindavan, I had the opportunity to massage him, and I was concerned that I didn’t give him pain. I asked Prabhupada, “Are you feeling pain?” Prabhupada looked at me as if to say, “What kind of a question is that?” and said, “No.” I could see that he was completely aloof from his bodily condition. His last purports, the third volume of the Tenth Canto, some of which I filmed him dictating, are lucid and clear. Although Prabhupada’s physical condition had deteriorated, his consciousness was perfectly clear, perfectly centered on Krishna.
