Garuda: I finally made a connection with a very small temple of about four devotees in Baltimore, which was about three blocks from where I lived. I would wake up at 3:45 in the morning and run like a madman through the city of Baltimore to get to the temple. It was a little scary in that neighborhood, but once I got to the temple, I felt happy and safe. I heard a few weeks later that Prabhupada was coming to the Henry Street temple in New York, so we drove all night to greet him for mangala-arati. I had heard so much about Prabhupada, and having heard so much of his voice on tapes, I was full of excitement to personally see him. I was struck at first with how short Prabhupada was, as he was a head shorter than me and I am not that tall. But because Prabhupada always seemed so grand being the guru, which means “heavy,” you could feel the weight of the tradition being carried by Prabhupada. This attracted me a lot because I was here to learn since I was a college student. I was seeking knowledge about yoga.
In my opinion the morning classes were in some ways better than the morning walks because during the morning walks there were so many devotees that you couldn’t hear Prabhupada as well. At one point in Mayapur, the classes were even more intimate because most of the devotees got sick. My wife at the time had volunteered to go into the kitchen, and she came back after a few hours and said, “We cannot eat this because the Bengali boys are stomping potatoes on the ground and little worms are going into the food.” Later Prabhupada found out about this as fewer devotees were attending his classes, and he was very upset with the devotee in charge. I, of course, was delighted because I could see and hear Prabhupada better than ever. On the day of Gaura-Purnima, Prabhupada quoted this verse from the Caitanya-caritamrta: jayatam suratau pangor mama manda-mater gati mat-sarvasva-padambhojau radha-madana-mohanau [Cc. Adi 1.15] “Glory to the all-merciful Radha and Madan-Mohan! I am lame and ill advised, yet They are my directors, and Their lotus feet are everything to me.” I remember Prabhupada told us how Krishna is called Madan-Mohan because he can captivate even Cupid whose business is to captivate men and women. But when Krishna attracts us, we can forget this Cupid attraction. I had a sense of a special relationship with the great sacred texts of the Vaishnava tradition by hearing Prabhupada speak on this verse. Just that morning class moved me into the work I have been doing up to this very day as a Professor of Religion, and I feel like I am celebrating that moment with Srila Prabhupada daily.
During the 1974 Mayapur Festival, Prabhupada was giving a morning class in the temple, but the Deity curtains had not yet opened. I decided to take my camera down to the other end of the temple room and take a shot of the whole event. Suddenly, Prabhupada stopped the class when the curtains opened, got off his vyasasan and was coming right towards me. I kept taking photos and Prabhupada was coming right towards me, but he was looking at Radha Madhava. I was stunned as I was in the visual range of Prabhupada’s ability to see Krishna. I was in the way! I was at the railing where Prabhupada was supposed to be. I didn’t know what to do as Prabhupada was still looking just at the Deity. Then he got down to offer obeisances and so I followed suit, at which time our shoulders touched. I didn’t know whether this was inappropriate or what, but I was thrilled. I know that the other devotees were wondering, “Why are you there? Who are you? Should you even exist? How dare you get in the way of this extraordinary embodiment of the Vaishnava tradition?” But upon reflection, I was able to feel a small portion of the depth of Prabhupada’s meditation and thus sample a taste of samadhi.
I went on a morning walk with Prabhupada in Dallas. The devotees there had an idea to take Prabhupada to a particularly beautiful park, which required getting in cars and driving some distance from the temple. It was dark out when we arrived at the park, and there was a gate that was closed with a sign that read, “Park closed. Open at sunrise and closed at sunset.” Prabhupada said, “No problem, we will walk up and down in the parking lot.” [laughs] Prabhupada was so appreciative and loving towards the devotees that he didn’t want to make them feel bad for not checking out thoroughly when the park would be open. So there we were, about twenty or twenty-five of us walking up and down a parking lot that had a little bit of an incline. This went on for maybe thirty or forty minutes, and Prabhupada would chant and we would stop and talk sometimes. The thing about the parking lot, however, was that it was gravelly, and you could hear Prabhupada’s cane as he walked. After some time, a jogger came in our direction and as he approached us he said to Prabhupada, “Good morning.” Prabhupada said, “Good morning to you.” I remember looking at the devotees who were surprised that Prabhupada didn’t say something like, “Hare Krishna,” or some other kind of sacred greeting. But this reminded me that Prabhupada was a perfect gentleman. And that was how Prabhupada defined a devotee in that famous news interview down in Gainesville when he was asked, “How can you tell a devotee when you see a devotee?” Prabhupada answered, “You will know by the fact that he is a perfect gentleman.” I am also assuming that he meant a perfect lady as well, so that was a nice meditation.
Back in 1974 at that first Mayapur Festival, when devotees from all around the world came to Mayapur, the journey was divided up into two-week portions. The first two weeks were spent in Mayapur and then we would all go to Vrindavan. The Krishna Balaram temple was simply columns of bricks rising into the sky, but Prabhupada’s quarters in the back were finished. The devotees stayed in a place called Fogal Ashram, a ten-minute or so walk from the temple area. Every morning Prabhupada would give class there as they set up an asana fairly high in the atrium area. At that point even more devotees were getting sick, so there were only about fifteen of us during the class. I was perhaps fifteen to twenty feet from where Prabhupada was sitting and there was only one person between Prabhupada and me, sort of in my line of vision. I remember as the class was going on, Prabhupada looked over towards me and then he looked over towards Brahmananda. He said, “Brahmananda, what is he doing?” pointing at me. I thought, “Who else could he be pointing to?” He was literally looking and pointing at me. Brahmananda looked over and he said, “Prabhupada, he is sleeping.” Prabhupada said, “Go over there and tell him to leave.” Big Brahmananda walked over towards me and I was wondering, “Was I asleep?” I was thinking, “I’m well, I’m rested, and I’m like one of the only people in the whole group that actually can stay awake during class because I have not gotten sick.” Brahmananda headed right towards me and then he suddenly stopped at the person in front of me. Now I didn’t know that he was falling asleep, but suddenly such great relief came over me that I was not the one to be told to leave. But then again as I was reflecting a little later, I thought that was a wake-up call. Maybe I wasn’t asleep, but maybe I was still asleep in a certain way. I figured that was also meant for me. “Wake up, Garuda, wake up. Hear carefully. Pursue the process of sravanam very carefully. Don’t take it for granted. It is the first step and then we can move on to the other eight steps. Sravanam, it’s all about sravanam, hearing.”
When Prabhupada first came to Philadelphia, he was interviewed at the airport by a female reporter with whom Prabhupada had many exchanges back and forth. She was questioning Prabhupada about women’s participation within ISKCON, but apparently she left somewhat distraught, dissatisfied with what Prabhupada was saying. She felt Prabhupada appeared to favor men over women, or at least the philosophy did. When Prabhupada arrived at the temple, he offered his respects to the Deity and then sat on his asana. I was sitting within a few feet of Prabhupada as he was reflecting back on the interview with the female reporter. I could tell he wasn’t happy with the way it ended up. Then he wanted to set the record straight. He said, “Male or female, everyone on the dancing platform is equal; there is no higher or lower.” I was first struck by how he described the spiritual world as the “dancing platform.” Then I admired how Prabhupada felt like he had to sort of recapitulate and reconsider and reflect and maybe redo in some sense his response to this lady’s query. He seemed concerned and was deeply thoughtful.
In 1975 Prabhupada came to Dallas, Texas, to the temple on Gurley Avenue. I remember one evening Prabhupada gave a very short class and then he started chanting the maha-mantra, which then broke out into a kirtan among all the devotees. What added to the kirtan was the dancing that ensued. The temple room was previously a gymnasium, so the room lent itself to running around, which is in fact what happened. The devotees were so moved by Prabhupada’s chanting that they would run down towards Prabhupada, and then they would run all the way across down to the Deities and back and forth. I was observing this and I was just looking at Prabhupada chanting the maha-mantra and realized that everything is there. I knew I didn’t fully appreciate the mantra, but I could tell there was so much more there for me to gain. And what I learned from the incident was that I could look forward to extraordinary journeys into the maha-mantra.
I think the most powerful attribute that Prabhupada exhibited was the very palpable sense that he was the embodiment of the parampara. It had come together in Prabhupada in a way that would impact the world, but more specifically that would empower me. I was not one who would like to imitate Prabhupada in his mannerisms, his language, but rather he empowered me to be me. He infused within me the sense that I have a tiny roll here and it was about finding my own devotional voice. I have a very different personality than Prabhupada. I’m not bold like Prabhupada was. Prabhupada could shock people sometimes with what he said. But my personality is not to shock. But rather he infused in me the power to be more me in relation to Radha and Krishna. I think that’s guru.
