Mahavir: After the temple opening in Brazil, I arrived in Mayapur just before the festival. I was a young brahmachari and I was distracted—I wanted to become a sannyasi. I wanted to grow and get more prominent so Prabhupada would see me. Unfortunately in my case, beneath the surface there were other things that I wanted also. It was the first time I’d been to India and I felt it was an incredible place, huge and beautiful and powerful. Out loud I said to myself, “I would love to manage this place.” When I said that, although I wasn’t aware of who he was, Jayapataka Maharaj was sitting next to me. Late that night Hari Sauri Prabhu told me, “Prabhupada would like to see you.” When I went in the room, there was Hridayananda Maharaj, Jayapataka Maharaj and Srila Prabhupada. Prabhupada said to me, “So you’d like to stay here?” I was overwhelmed that a question was being directed at me and I said, “Yes.” They talked about it a bit. Prabhupada wanted Bhavananda to go up and down the Ganges preaching from a boat, and he wanted Jayapataka Maharaj to preach to politicians and Indians, so help was needed in Mayapur. Since I was Canadian, which helped visa-wise, and since I was a manager, I was targeted. After I walked out of the room, what I had said yes to, hit me—in Brazil I was the big honcho. My doubts got so heavy that I changed my mind and asked Prabhupada if I could go back to Brazil. Prabhupada agreed, “Okay, you don’t have to stay, you can go back.” But later I was asked back into his room and Prabhupada said, “Have you made your mind up yet? Do you want to stay?” I was under the impression I was already released, but I couldn’t say no to Srila Prabhupada. I knew you’re supposed to do what he asked you to do. So I said yes, but when I walked out of the room it hit me again. I went back in and said, “Srila Prabhupada, I don’t know what the devotees in Brazil are going to do. There’s 40, 50 people there already, a BBT, temples, but I’m the only one there who has had any experience. I need to go back.” Prabhupada said, “Okay,” but sometime later he again asked me if I would stay in Mayapur and again I said yes. Afterwards I got completely overwhelmed again, went back, asked if I could leave, and again he said, “Okay.” I don’t remember how many times this went back and forth. Finally one day during his massage he turned to me and kindly said, “In the spiritual world, we all have different relationships with Krishna. So it’s okay, you can go back to Brazil.”
Prabhupada knew I was young and passionate and when I got to Mayapur the first thing he said to me was, “Do you want to take sannyas or do you want to get married?” So I knew he knew, and at that moment I had already resigned from the idea of taking sannyas. After Prabhupada had first asked me to help the Mayapur management, I set up my little office in a corner and without any instruction from anybody I immediately changed the cleanup time and generally created havoc. When Prabhupada returned from his morning walk and went into the temple room for gurupuja, the temple floor was wet because of my bad timing. Meanwhile I was somewhere else, changing something else. Prabhupada started going upstairs to his room while I was coming downstairs with a big smile, expecting glorification. Prabhupada pointed his cane at me and said, “Who do you think you are? You’re the king?” It was just a few days before the Mayapur festival and all my older God-brothers who I looked up to were standing there looking at me. Out of embarrassment I had an out-of-body experience. I went up to a cloud and watched the conversation. I was young, had been doing something I shouldn’t have been doing, got chastised, and took it hard. To make it worse, before this I’d been on the morning walks everyday, agitating people, butting in front of the sannyasis, and Sudama Maharaj had told me that when I stopped going Prabhupada had said, “Where’s Mr. Brazil?” and had started chastising me, “Oh, he thinks he’s the king.” Sudama Maharaj said, “You are getting the mercy.” But I thought, “Mercy? I’m just waiting for Krishna to take my life away.” Anyway, after the cleanup fiasco I went back to my room and became practically physically ill. I didn’t want to go out in public. The next day I was lying in bed feeling like it was over for me. I was at rock bottom. I’d been preaching, opening centers, and I wanted my guru to be happy with me but instead he yelled at me worse than my dad ever had. I heard the greeting of the Deities and then Hari Sauri Prabhu came in and said, “Prabhupada wants you at gurupuja.” I thought, “Oh, no,” it just got worse. But I did what I was told. I took a quick shower, got my dhoti on, and went to the back of the temple room, which was full, just in time for guru-puja. I hid behind Gurudas, who was a good size then, and saw Guru Kripa Prabhu grab the mridanga to begin leading when Prabhupada stopped him. At Prabhupada’s indication the devotees moved aside to make a direct channel between Srila Prabhupada and me. Prabhupada pointed at me and said to Guru Kripa, “Let him lead. He likes to chant.” At that moment I melted. Prabhupada had given me the most severe chastising of my life, which till today helps me, and I had also made contact with him as my father. It was an emotional morning program for me. It was the next day that I went to his room and asked if I could go back to Brazil, and that’s when he let me go. But during these conversations he had also said to me, “You should be in India, it’s good for you here.”
One morning in Vrindavan the American and European devotees complained to me that they wanted more fruit. At that time breakfast was chapatis and kichari, and lunch was chapati, dahl, rice and a subji. But I had already learned not to change anything, not to ruin a good thing. I went to Prabhupada and said, “Srila Prabhupada, the devotees want fruit in their diet.” Prabhupada said, “Humans are grain eaters. If they want to eat fruit, then that’s all they should eat. Don’t change it.” So I didn’t. I was happy because the chapatis—fresh and hot and just a little burnt— and the kichari were the best. The Vrindavan prasadam was delicious.
Once I was singing Jasomatinandana in a happy-go-lucky mood while I walked down the path on my way to the temple room. From Prabhupada’s room I heard Prabhupada ask Jagadish, “Is that Mahavir? Tell him to come in.” I quickly went in to Srila Prabhupada’s room and Prabhupada said, “Where in the world are there rivers like the Ganges, the Krishna, the Yamuna? India has the most beautiful rivers. There’s only one other place in the world that has a beautiful river, the St. Lawrence.” It stunned me because I’m from Canada. I think Prabhupada spoke about the rivers in India in this way to give me the real picture—so that I wouldn’t be in culture shock from India. Prabhupada talked about cleanliness and about how the dhotis of the local people looked dirty. He said, “Actually, none of those dhotis go 12 hours without being washed at least with water. Since the water has so much soil in it the clothes look gray—but they are always clean.”
Once in Prabhupada’s garden my wife and I were speaking together in Portuguese while she took care of the plants and I fixed things. Through his window, Prabhupada yelled for me to come inside. I went inside the room and he said, “Are you speaking Mexican?” I said, “No, Prabhupada, Portuguese.” Then he said, “You Americans ruin everything. One of you changes everything the person before you did. Then you go away and someone else comes and changes everything you did. When that person goes away another comes and changes things again. Stop changing everything. Just save it.” Since that day, that has stuck in my brain. Wherever I go, whatever I see and whatever needs to be fixed, I don’t change it. I can still hear Prabhupada saying, “Don’t change it.” I just take what’s there and improve on it—I try to make it better. Prabhupada’s instruction was so overwhelmingly important that I still use it in my business and in management.
