Radhanatha Swami: When I first arrived in India, I went to the Himalayas and adopted the life of a sadhu. I wore sadhu robes, had a little bag and pot, traveled through jungles and mountains, and learned from many great rishis, yogis, and sages. Sometimes I lived in jungle caves with yogis, and sometimes I lived in caves alone, practicing meditation. At other times I studied Buddhism in Buddhist monasteries. In this way I traveled around India, searching for Godrealization. Everyone wanted to initiate me, because to have a foreign disciple was very prestigious for yogis, gurus, and all other spiritual personalities. But I felt that until I found a guru whom I would never leave, I could not accept initiation. At one point I went to Bombay to renew my visa, and as I was walking down the street I saw a big sign saying, HARE KRISHNA FESTIVAL AT CROSS MAIDAN. I went there and met many devotees at a big pandal program. Srila Prabhupada was going to speak later that day, so I stayed, talked with the devotees, and read Prabhupada’s books. That night Srila Prabhupada came, sat on his vyasasana in the middle of the stage, and had kirtan with all of the devotees. There must have been more than 15,000 people in the audience. I was an insignificant sadhu with matted hair, a bag, and a pot, standing in the back of this massive crowd. One devotee, Gurudas, went all the way through the crowd and came to me. He took me by the hand and said, “Srila Prabhupada wants you to sit beside him.” I said, “How does Srila Prabhupada know me?” Gurudas repeated, “He wants you to sit beside him.” We walked through the thousands and thousands of people, and I went on the stage. Srila Prabhupada looked at me, smiled, and indicated that I should sit near him. I sat a few feet away from his vyasasana. Madhudvisa Swami led a beautiful kirtan. All of the devotees had clean, shaven heads and beautiful, clean dhotis and saris. I had river-stained sadhu clothes with holes in them and matted hair down practically to my waist. I was trying to be a sadhu. I thought, “Why has Srila Prabhupada called me here? I am not a good example compared to his devotees.” But he smiled upon me graciously and encouraged me.
After Prabhupada had lectured, he got up and started to walk off the stage. As he walked by me, I reached out to touch his feet, because I was taught you’re supposed to touch a holy man’s feet and place the dust upon your head. But one of his senior disciples yelled at me, “No one is allowed to touch Srila Prabhupada’s feet.” Very embarrassed, I pulled my hand back. Prabhupada looked at me, smiled, and gave me my first instruction. He said, “You can touch my feet.” I touched his lotus feet and placed the dust on my head. He smiled very mercifully and told me, “You come and sit here every night.”
I knew many of the residents of Vrindavan, and some of them told me that Swami Bhaktivedanta and his disciples were living in Sharaf Bhavan, a wealthy man’s house. When I went there early one morning, Srila Prabhupada was chanting Jaya Radha Madhava. I appreciated his chanting more than I had appreciated anything else in my whole life. Never before had I seen such gravity and intensity of devotion as I saw in Srila Prabhupada as he chanted Krishna’s names. I had met many of the greatest yogis and gurus of the Himalayas, as well as many great Christian and Muslim saints. For six months I had traveled in Vrindavan, meeting babajis, many of his God-brothers, many famous Brijabasi saints. But I had never seen such a depth of love and compassion as I saw in Srila Prabhupada while he chanted Radha Madhava. My heart completely transformed. Then he gave a lecture, and every question I ever had was answered in that one lecture. Everything I had ever learned in every religion was included within his message, plus something far more sublime. It was at that time, sitting at his feet in Vrindavan, that I had accepted, “This is my spiritual master, and I must surrender my life to him.”
Srila Prabhupada took us on parikram to many holy places. He took us to Govardhan, Varsana, and Nandagram. He took us to various places in Vrindavan like the Radha-Damodar Temple and the Radha-Govindaji Temple. One day he took us to Madhuban-Gokula and Brahmanda Ghat, where Krishna was accused of eating dirt and then revealed the universe within His mouth to Mother Yasoda. Srila Prabhupada animatedly told that story, right at the place where it happened. Wherever he took us he told us the story of that place. Then he told us to take bath in the Yamuna. All the devotees invited Prabhupada to take bath also. Srila Prabhupada said, “Today I am very sick and I cannot take bath. You all go in and enjoy a nice bath in Yamuna.” All the devotees were in the Yamuna, and Prabhupada was sitting on the steps high over the river, watching the devotees enjoy the ambrosial water. He was smiling and became so ecstatic that he quickly got up, took off his clothes, put on a gumsha, and took bath with us. The devotees were ecstatic. Everyone gathered around him and bathed him with Yamuna water like an abhisek. Srila Prabhupada was happy to be bathing in the Yamuna along with his disciples in the holy land of Vrindavan.
Every day after the parikram devotees would take prasadam. Then Srila Prabhupada would have darshan in his room and meet his old friends from Vrindavan, his God-brothers and many others. There was a rule that devotees were not supposed to be there, because in the afternoon they were supposed to do seva, harinam sankirtan, and other services. But I used to sit there all afternoon, listening to him talk with his old Brijabasi friends. One day the regional manager of ISKCON for India saw me sitting with Srila Prabhupada. He told me that no devotees were allowed to be with Prabhupada during his darshan time. I looked at Prabhupada, Prabhupada looked at me, and I said to this devotee, “I’m not a devotee.” I pointed to my matted hair, he looked at Prabhupada, and Prabhupada smiled. Then he left, and I got to stay with Prabhupada. It was beautiful seeing Prabhupada with his old friends, especially Krishnadas Babaji. When Krishnadas Babaji Maharaj came into the room, Prabhupada’s eyes became filled with tears, and Krishnadas Babaji Maharaj’s eyes became full of tears. Prabhupada stood up, and Babaji Maharaj called out, “Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna!” Prabhupada practically ran to him and embraced him. I had never seen such affection and love between two people as there was between Prabhupada and his God-brother Krishnadas Babaji. Prabhupada, with his arms around Krishnadas Babaji, took him to his own seat behind a little table. They sat together with their arms around each other, talking in Bengali. I couldn’t understand, but Prabhupada was laughing and laughing. Every now and then they would slap each other on the legs. They were practically sitting on top of each other, and there were tears in their eyes. They were so happy to be together, discussing transcendental subject matters. It was amazing, because there must have been fifteen other people in the room, but Krishnadas Babaji Maharaj and Srila Prabhupada were completely oblivious of everyone. They were in their own world, hearing and chanting the glories of the Lord.
The devotees thought that I should join the movement. They told me that Srila Prabhupada was going to be taking them to different places in India, and that I could be Srila Prabhupada’s personal servant because they were always getting sick in India, but since I was accustomed to living there, I didn’t. I said, “Thank you very much for this wonderful offer, but I will serve Srila Prabhupada when he does something in Vrindavan.” I had decided to stay in Vrindavan for the rest of my life. So the devotees criticized and harassed me, saying that I was a sahajiya, a bogus smarta brahman. They said that Lord Chaitanya’s movement is to preach Krishna consciousness. I thought, “These Western people do not understand Vrindavan.” One day, as Srila Prabhupada was walking to his car after giving a lecture, I, along with crowds of other people, bowed down to him. When I got up Srila Prabhupada was in front of me. I was on my knees looking up at Srila Prabhupada, who had a serious, concerned expression and was looking right at me. I felt that he was looking into my soul and that it was touched by Srila Prabhupada’s glance. Never before in my life had I had a sensation like that. Srila Prabhupada asked, “How long have you been living in Vrindavan?” I thought, “Oh no, all the devotees have been chastising me and now Srila Prabhupada’s going to chastise me.” Shyly I said, “Srila Prabhupada, I’ve been here about six months.” Prabhupada stood silently looking at me, penetrating me with his glance. It seemed like hours. Perhaps it was about thirty seconds. Then his face blossomed into a beautiful, ecstatic smile, and he said, “Very nice. Vrindavan is the most wonderful place,” rubbed me on the head and walked on. I thought, “Everyone is chastising me for being in Vrindavan, but Prabhupada knows what I need to hear to become attached to him.” After that I was ready to go anywhere and do anything for him, because I felt he understood and loved me. His encouragement made me attached to him and to devotional service.
One day he was giving Srimad-Bhagavatam class, and he said, “You are distributing my books. But are you reading my books? If you try to convince someone to buy the books, what happens if the person asks, ‘Do you read these books? What are they about?’ If you tell them, ‘I don’t read these books. I only sell these books,’ then how will you convince them? Unless you are convinced of the subject matter of these books by reading them carefully, how will you convince others to buy and read them?” He strongly told all the book distributors that they have to carefully read his books.
After Srila Prabhupada left, I heard that he would be going to the mountains of New Vrindavan in August to give special Bhagavatdharma discourses. Also, he was going to celebrate Janmastami and Vyasa-puja in New Vrindavan, and people were needed to help prepare. I thought that I would go to New Vrindavan and then return to Vrindavan, India. In New Vrindavan there was great enthusiasm to prepare everything for Prabhupada’s coming. I was helping with the painting and renovations of an old, beaten-up house called Madhuban. The night before Srila Prabhupada was to arrive, someone discovered that the toilet didn’t work. Everyone wanted to take rest, and I was told to fix the toilet. I had never fixed a toilet in my life. I didn’t know what I was doing, but I was doing anything to try to get it to flush. I was up all night, and just as Srila Prabhupada arrived I pushed the lever and it flushed. I thought, “Prabhupada is going to be so happy, he has a toilet that flushes.” Srila Prabhupada went in the Madhuban house, and I was feeling proud that I had made his toilet flush. When it was time for Srila Prabhupada to use the toilet, the devotees said, “This toilet works very nicely.” Prabhupada took his lota, went out into the field, and responded to nature in the field. Then he took his bath in the field. He said, “I enjoy responding to nature in the grass with the fresh breezes.” The whole time Srila Prabhupada was there, he went out to the field to respond to nature. He never once used the toilet. So Srila Prabhupada gave me a lesson in detachment. We should be willing to give anything and everything to please our guru. But we cannot be attached to the results.
Every day Srila Prabhupada went to the top of a mountain, where there was a beautiful pavilion. Devotees had worked very hard to make this pavilion, with a wonderful stage and a vyasasana, where Prabhupada could deliver his discourses. Hundreds of devotees and guests from all over America had come to hear these Bhagavat-dharma discourses. The devotees had also spent weeks making a palanquin for Prabhupada, but when it was time to use it they couldn’t find it. Finally they found the palanquin and took him up the mountain to the pavilion with a kirtan procession. But the palanquin was so uncomfortable that when they got to the top, he said, “Isn’t there a car that can drive me up here?” After that, Hayagriva drove him up in a Volkswagen.
On Janmastami night Sri Sri Radha-Vrindavan Chandra were being moved into a new temple, which the devotees had just completed. There was about a month’s worth of work to be done, and the devotees were working frantically because at a certain hour Prabhupada was scheduled to see Radha-Vrindavan Chandra in Their new temple. So, just as Prabhupada was walking in one door, ladders and buckets were running out the door to the pujari room. When Prabhupada was inside, everything was perfect and complete. But the walls had just been painted. We were praying that Prabhupada wouldn’t touch the walls. Prabhupada looked at the beautiful Deities, Radha-Vrindavan Chandra, with tears in his eyes. He said, “Your Radha-Vrindavan Chandra are most beautiful. They have appeared before you, like the most beautiful American boy and girl, just to attract your hearts. Your worship is very beautiful. But be careful. There are two paths of bhakti, the pancharatriki vidhi, and the bhagavata vidhi. Pancharatriki vidhi means worshiping the Deity with great devotion and performing all services for the pleasure of the Deity. And bhagavata vidhi means hearing and chanting the glories of the Lord.” He said, “They are like two rails on the same train track, they must go together. If you are not attentively hearing Srimad-Bhagavatam and chanting the holy names every day, one day you will look at Radha-Vrindavan Chandra and think, ‘Why has my Guru Maharaj left me with this burden?’” His words seared into our hearts. From that day on, the sadhana of the New Vrindavan devotees was incredibly strict. Devotees were getting up at two in the morning to chant their rounds. Everyone attended Srimad-Bhagavatam class. Prabhupada inspired that.
After the kirtan and arati, Srila Prabhupada told the devotees to read Krishna Book. It was a small temple, and it was completely overcrowded with devotees. The Deities were in the front, Prabhupada was in the back, and there was an aisle between Prabhupada and the Deities that was left open. Along the two sides of the aisle were all the sannyasis of North America, sitting facing each other with their dandas in hand. Behind them the devotees were crowded tightly together. A sannyasi started to read. By this time it was late at night, and it was so hot you could hardly breathe. Everyone was falling asleep. People were falling down and being caught by each other. You would see the sannyasis’ dandas bobbing back and forth as they fell asleep. Nobody could stay awake in the whole temple room, but Prabhupada was sitting on the vyasasana with his back straight, attentively hearing the glories of Lord Krishna. When the devotee finally read, “Thus ends the First Chapter of the Krishna Book, entitled, ‘The Advent of Lord Krishna,’” everyone was so happy that they chanted, “Jaya, Srila Prabhupada!” Not because of the book, but because it was over (Laughs). With complete gravity Srila Prabhupada said, “Next chapter.” Someone started reading the next chapter while the devotees were still falling asleep. We had fasted all day, and everyone was struggling and straining, because besides being tired, we were also very hungry. By this time it was after midnight. The second chapter is long. It seemed to go on for hours. Finally the devotee read, “Thus ends the Second Chapter of Krishna Book, entitled, ‘The Prayers By the Demigods to Krishna in the Womb.’” Everyone was happy that it was over, thinking in terms of prasadam and sleep. They chanted, “Jaya, Prabhupada!” Prabhupada said, “Next chapter.” They started reading the next chapter. Looking at Srila Prabhupada, I thought of how Maharaj Pariksit sat for seven days and seven nights hearing the glories of the Lord with rapt attention and tasting the sweetness of the ambrosia. Srimad-Bhagavatam states that the sign of a great soul is that he has a taste for hearing Krishna’s glories. While we were struggling and straining, falling asleep, falling down, and praying that the reading would end, Prabhupada was completely immersed in the ecstasy of hearing Krishna’s lila. Finally the next chapter ended, and by that time the devotees were hardly able to say, “Jaya, Prabhupada” (laughs). Srila Prabhupada looked at the pathetic group of us. He smiled, still sitting erect, completely immersed in Krishna’s lila, and said, “I think that you are all very tired and hungry, so we will end here.” Then as loud as you could imagine, everybody chanted, “Jaya, Prabhupada!” Srila Prabhupada was happy to see all of us together at New Vrindavan.
When Srila Prabhupada came to New Vrindavan I was to garland him, which was a very special service. The plan was that Srila Prabhupada was going to be escorted into the temple, and when he sat on his vyasasana, I was to garland him. So when Prabhupada came out of his Lincoln Continental, I was right there with a tray with Prabhupada’s garland on it. Everybody was pushing to be with Prabhupada, but because I had his garland, I was allowed to walk right behind him. We entered the temple, and Srila Prabhupada bowed down before Sri Sri Radha-Vrindavan Chandra. With great emotion he stared at the Deities for a minute or two, and then he sat on the vyasasana. By that time all of the devotees had crowded into the temple room and begun kirtan. I approached Srila Prabhupada with the garland. Srila Prabhupada looked at me, smiled, and then bent his head down for me to put the garland on. But I felt so shy that I didn’t put the garland on him. Prabhupada was looking at me with his head bowed, indicating, “Go ahead and put it on.” But I just stood there. Prabhupada didn’t say anything, but with his eyes, he said many things. At that time I was a brahmachari. One of my sannyasi God-brothers was standing next to me, and I gave him the garland and he put it on Srila Prabhupada. Srila Prabhupada didn’t look at my God-brother. He just looked at me, and he was pleased. He nodded his head as if to say, “Yes, this is correct, you have understood.” He didn’t say anything, but through his gesture and through his eyes he spoke in such a way that I could understand, “Yes. To be the servant of my servant is the best way to please me.” That was one of the most wonderful instructions Srila Prabhupada ever gave me. With my life and soul I am endeavoring to try to follow that instruction.
Advaita Acharya, one of my God-brothers, asked Prabhupada about siddha deha. As soon as he said “siddha deha,” Prabhupada cut him off. He said, “What is this nonsense, ‘siddha deha?’ You are filled with so many bad qualities. Don’t talk about siddha deha. First purify yourself through hari nam, through following the regulative principles, through the basic principles of Krishna consciousness. Until you’re purified, don’t talk about ‘siddha deha.’” He was as strong as a lion. Another devotee asked, “What if one falls down after taking initiation?” Again Srila Prabhupada was like a lion. He said, “What is this, ‘fall down’? There is no question of fall down. You have taken a vow in front of your spiritual master, in front of the Deities, in front of the sacred fire, in front of the assembly of Vaishnavas. You have made your promise. How can you break your promise? No gentleman will break such a promise. There is no question of falling down.” Another devotee named Janardan asked Srila Prabhupada, “Sometimes people say that, ‘I don’t need a guru because God speaks to me within my heart.’ What do we say to such a person?” Prabhupada became very grave and heavy. He said, “You don’t know how to answer this question? You don’t read my books? Why can’t you answer this question, you rascal?” He chastised Janardan severely and then explained that in the Bhagavad-gita, Krishna says that He speaks only to the person who constantly serves Him with love, who worships Him with complete devotion, and who does not fall down under any circumstance. “Why don’t you answer this? Why don’t you know these verses?” He went on and on, chastising Janardan. It was so heavy that everyone was paralyzed. We couldn’t cope with Prabhupada’s anger. A devotee named Kulashekar asked Prabhupada a simple question to change the subject, but Prabhupada just went back to Janardan and continued to chastise him. He said, “You are a rascal. You have simply come to disturb me.” In this way Srila Prabhupada stressed that we should know his books and be able to preach accordingly. He had given so much of his life and energy to write these books for us. He speaks through his books. We don’t have to ask him these things personally. That was the lesson he taught us that day.
I was the pujari at the old Vrindavan farm, which was on the other side of the mountain. To see Srila Prabhupada each evening, I had to climb down one mountain, cross a small river, and then climb up another mountain. Every day I passed a rose bush that had one beautiful, fully blossomed rose. It was a miracle. I would pick that rose and offer that rose at Srila Prabhupada’s lotus feet when he was sitting on his vyasasana. Often when he was lecturing he would pick up that rose and hold it in his hand. One day he had a garland of marigolds, and he was holding and smelling the rose I had offered him. As he looked at the rose he said, “Just like this rose is a flower and these marigolds are also flowers. Although they are both flowers, still the rose is the best of flowers. Similarly, we are all simultaneously one with and different from Krishna. Although we are one with Krishna, still Krishna is Krishna. Krishna is the rose.” He used the different flowers as an example of achintya bheda bheda tattva, simultaneously one and different.
During one evening darshan I was feeling a little guilty because I had lost my counting beads. In New Vrindavan in those days it was not easy to get counting beads. I was chanting sixteen rounds daily, but on that particular evening I wasn’t sure whether I had finished my rounds or not. I was sitting a few feet from Srila Prabhupada’s vyasasana when I thought, “I’m not sure whether I finished my rounds today.” At that moment Srila Prabhupada looked at me very sincerely. During the darshan, when he wasn’t talking to people, he’d chant japa. He held up his bead bag, took one of his counting beads, and very meticulously, slowly and deliberately pulled it down. Then he let go of the counting bead and opened his palm, still looking at me. I thought, “Srila Prabhupada wants me to get counting beads. He wants to make sure that I don’t compromise, that I chant sixteen rounds properly every day.”
One evening, it was raining and very cold when the devotees gathered for darshan at the front door of Srila Prabhupada’s house. Srila Prabhupada’s secretary, Pusta Krishna Maharaj, came out and told us that Srila Prabhupada would not be giving darshan that night. We were very sad that we wouldn’t have Srila Prabhupada’s precious association, and we started walking away. Then through a window, Srila Prabhupada saw us and told Pusta Krishna, “Call them in.” Usually darshan was outside, but on this night, Pusta Krishna Maharaj said, “Srila Prabhupada wants you to come in for darshan.” We all crowded into his living room and sat down. Srila Prabhupada was very ill, and it was announced that he would not speak. With his head on his hand, Prabhupada sat with us while Pradyumna read about the symptoms of Kali-yuga from the Twelfth Canto of Srimad-Bhagavatam. Prabhupada was enlivened to hear Vedavyasa’s descriptions of what will come in Kali-yuga. Every time Pradyumna read a symptom, Srila Prabhupada suddenly became free of his sickness. He became dynamic and joyful and began to speak. He said, “People will travel long distances just to go to a place of pilgrimage. This is a symptom of Kali. For example, today people living on the bank of the Ganges in Calcutta take much trouble to go to Hardwar to bathe in the Ganges. Similarly, you are in New Vrindavan. New Vrindavan is non-different than Vrindavan. You have no need to go anywhere. Vrindavan is here, and Krishna is here.” Hearing this, all of the devotees became very happy. Then Pradyumna read about how, in Kali-yuga, beauty will be judged by how long one grows his hair. Prabhupada said, “Yes, Vedavyas could see past, present, and future. At the time he wrote Srimad-Bhagavatam, there was no hippie movement, but he knew that the hippie movement would come.” Then he began to explain how Srimad-Bhagavatam was the perfect scripture because it was compiled by Vedavyas. He had perfect realization, perfect vision of past, present, and future and perfect vision of Krishna. In this way, what originally appeared to be a despondent night of not hearing from Prabhupada became a most wonderful darshan.
Toward the beginning of his visit in New Vrindavan, the weather became cold and rainy. Srila Prabhupada’s secretary said that Srila Prabhupada was going to cut his trip short because the weather was not good for his health. Kirtanananda Swami became sad and told Srila Prabhupada, “If you cannot live here happily, then we will sell this place and start New Vrindavan somewhere else.” I’ll never forget Srila Prabhupada’s reply. He said, “No. Because you are protecting Krishna’s cows here, your mission is perfect. It is a success.” Then he said, “I will stay until the end of my scheduled visit.”
I was the pujari at Radha-Vrindavannath’s temple, which was the brahmacharis’ temple. Srila Prabhupada was very merciful to me. Every day I used to make sandesh. Whenever anyone from New Vrindavan visited Prabhupada, they would bring him a box of sandesh that I had made, and out of his great kindness Prabhupada always appreciated it. When he came to New Vrindavan, he told me that he wanted my sandesh with every meal, three times a day. One particular night I came with a picture of Radha-Vrindavannath. Kirtanananda Swami had decided that Srila Prabhupada should not go to Their temple because the road was too treacherous and because the ashram was primitive. He thought it would be an inconvenience for Prabhupada. As the pujari, I thought, “If he’s not going to come to see the Deities, the Deities can come to see him.” So I brought a photo. Pusta Krishna was not allowing anyone in his room, but I said, “I have a gift for Prabhupada.” So he said, “All right, come in.” I offered Srila Prabhupada the picture of Radha-Vrindavannath, the only photo we had of Them. Prabhupada looked at it and was happy. He asked Kirtanananda Swami, “Is this Radha-Vrindavan Chandra?” Kirtanananda Swami said, “No, this is Radha-Vrindavannath, and this is the boy who always makes sandesh for you.” Srila Prabhupada began to talk about Vrindavan, and then he said, “You will take me to Radha-Vrindavannath?” Kirtanananda Swami said, “No, Prabhupada. The road is very bad. It is very difficult to go there.” Prabhupada said, “Do you have a Jeep? We will go. I want to go.” He insisted. They took him by Jeep part of the way, and then he walked the rest of the way. On the way he passed cows grazing, and one of them was the first cow of ISKCON, who Prabhupada had named Kaliya. She was a small, old, black Jersey. When she saw Srila Prabhupada, she ran to him. Prabhupada had not seen her since 1968, when he first came to New Vrindavan, and this was eight years later. One devotee said, “Prabhupada, this is a very special cow.” Prabhupada said, “Yes, I know, this is Kaliya.” Kaliya walked beside Prabhupada to Radha-Vrindavannath’s temple.
Prabhupada encouraged us and tried to increase our enthusiasm for devotional service. Once when he was eating the sandesh I prepared for him, he said, “This is the best sandesh that I ever tasted in my entire life.” On another occasion somebody from some other place brought him sandesh and asked, “Do you like this sandesh?” He said, “It is very good, but it is not as good as Radhanatha’s.” In this way he would enliven us and invoke our desire to serve him and Krishna. Another time, a devotee named Taru made sweet rice. Prabhupada said, “In forty years I have not tasted such good sweet rice.” Still another time, Chandramauli Swami made pera for Srila Prabhupada. Prabhupada said, “I have not tasted pera like this for many years. Please give this to me with all my meals.”
It was wonderful when Srila Prabhupada gave cookies to the children during guru puja. I thought, “This is a real preacher.” The children couldn’t understand philosophy, and they weren’t able to follow the Srimad- Bhagavatam class. But Srila Prabhupada knew that if they became attached to him, they would go back to Godhead. So, with a beautiful, loving smile, like a father he would give each child a cookie. The children loved him. Everything Srila Prabhupada did was to induce our love for him, because he knew that our love for him was carried to the lotus feet of Sri Sri Radha and Krishna.
The depth of Srila Prabhupada’s compassion was something that invoked a mood of surrender from my hard heart. He was willing to extend himself and sacrifice himself to give us Krishna consciousness. The compassion and the concern and the love he had for conditioned souls was something that I had never seen before. I lived with several of Srila Prabhupada’s God-brothers who were, like Srila Prabhupada, extremely learned in the sastra. But Srila Prabhupada’s deep, deep merciful nature to give his life for us was something that I had never experienced before anywhere in anyone.
